A Muster of Muffler Men

On Sunday I drove to Berkeley Springs, to stock up with their delicious spring water, useful info here. I would be drinking from the same spring that George Washington had long ago loved to bathe in. My first time at filling up, I was curious, wondering if I would be too embarrassed to take my containers if I was the only one there. But it was quite busy, people walking back and forth with 1 gallon plastic bottles, like me, or wheeling in larger containers. This water tasted better than anything you'll find on a shelf, and filling up your own bottles means it's free. The farmers' market was also busy so I strolled over and grabbed an organic chicken burrito for lunch.

On the way home, I'd decided to explore some of the back roads, and was pleased to see that as soon as I veered off from Rte 522 almost immediately I passed a line of bible bashing placards lined up along by the river. If this was how my afternoon of quirky delights was going to progress then I was going to be happy. Then sure enough, just a few miles down the road I saw this...

I parked my car off the road and grabbed my camera, walking forward to see these huge garden ornaments better. There was no one at home, I knocked on the door, and was standing on the driveway wondering if I should chance getting shot as a trespasser when a neighbor from up the hill drove by, informed me that he worked for them, and that it was fine to walk in and look at the figures. Not needing to be told twice, I marched ahead, pulling the lens cap off the Sony.

 Ranger Smith and Cindy Bear, originally both from Jellystone Park, MI., welcome passing people from the front of the house.

I just stood marveling at these humungous effigies before I took any photos. And as I stood looking about I saw the field next door was full of llamas and alpacas, also standing still, and all staring at me. For now I ignored them, focusing on these marvelous giants above me.
I did some research when I got home and discovered that this Land of Giants belonged to George and Pam Farnham. George had once worked as a lawyer in DC but in the 1980's he escaped to come here, with Pam joining him later from New York. They had a few larger than life garden ornaments but when they discovered that there were plans for a housing estate to be built across the road, they created a collection of outhouses, sporting a slogan, "If over-development sucks your well dry, you'll need one of these." That was back in 2006 and there's still no new houses on that land!

 Surfer Dude at 26ft is called Brian, after the Beach Boys Brian Wilson. Obtained in 2005 he's had a paint job since the photo shown on Roadside America. I like his flamingo shorts much better.

Muffler Man at 21ft, was a gift from Pam for George's 50th birthday. George had originally wanted a huge dinosaur after visiting Dinosaur Land in White Post, but Pam couldn't find one of those. I spotted a bird busily building a nest in his crown, quite a magnificent view from up there. Roadside America have also created an impressive list of Muffler Men in the USA.

This 1963 Unigal 17ft giantess was one that George had been searching for. Rarer than many of her peers, she came from Mississippi, originally wearing a skirt and jacket, covering up her bikini in her more reserved former home. These were removed on arrival to WV in 2008 and now she proudly sports her biker tattoos and bright purple swimwear. Only about 100 were ever made and George reported that he thought there were only 11 now left.

This 23ft cashier was from Big John Grocery Stores, IL

A 21ft high Paul Bunyon but minus his axe, which George and Pam are looking for.

I couldn't find out where the bird came from but recognized Bruce the Shark from Finding Nemo as he glared into the pond, carefully holding a fragile birds nest in his sharp teeth.

There's even a roller coaster in the yard with The Simpsons enjoying the ride along with clowns. A small shed which I assumed was the power house was beautifully painted in a Christmas theme. The front yard was also home to an impressive collection of garden ornaments, cement statues of mermaids, gargoyles, lions and dogs. I didn't hang around too long, I felt a little uncomfortable walking about the yard of people who weren't at home, despite having been given permission.

Still staring, the llamas and alpacas posed for a photo but had no intention of leaving their hay to come over for a cuddle.

A 19ft Santa Claus greets or waves farewell to folks as they pass, with larger than life Christmas ornaments hanging from the trees. Not pictured are 2 large apples from the 2005 Winchester Apple Blossom Festival,  Also not pictured is a 22ft pink flamingo, something that George is still looking for as a gift to Pam, an eagle with a 12ft wingspan and a pterodactyl flying next to it. With these lawn ornaments running into thousands of dollars, George and Pam have quite an impressive collection. I've never seen anything like this before, and apparently there's very few cars that will pass by the first time without stopping. I'm betting this fibreglass and cement family will add to their members, warranting another visit in the future.There's no zoning laws in WV so the sky is their limit. Literally.

The Wagon stopped Rollin'

Early Saturday morning our little urbexing group met early to explore a new abandonment. Someone in DCUE had discovered it, posted photos on Facebook but hadn't divulged its location upon requests. Another person posted an old image on his post of their memory and it was game over, location uncloaked, with a little detective work.

It was a restaurant that had put on theatrical performances, closing late 2013. The reviews had been mixed, some lamenting its closure and reminiscing over old memories, wishing they could return, while others showed no surprise at its final curtain call, complaining loudly at the horrendous food, stale and dreary atmosphere and a decor that hadn't changed since its opening.  We weren't concerned about any of that, just excited that a new place to explore had been discovered.

I loved the statues by the entrance, some missing heads, or damaged from cold temperatures but a few were intact, covered in green damp algae, some also featured by the small pond that had once been part of a pretty covered patio lit with small lights. Now, the water was still, almost ominous with its black imperceivable depth, dark shadows thrown into all the corners. The bright sunshine outside managed to squeeze through a few roof openings and past the small stone figures perched on a brick perimeter wall, casting rectangles of light across the oily water..

Inside was like stepping into the 70's. Windows made from wagon wheels were still intact, exposed brick walls and wide wooden planked floors, the color reminding me immediately of those 'American Tan' colored tights that no girl ever wanted to wear. Do they still make those? A fire that looked like it had come straight from a 70's A-frame house was still sitting in a corner, perched on a grey 'crazy-paving' hearth.

There was a stage section at the back, with a dressing room area and theater lights hanging with cobwebs moving slowly in the breeze. It was dark and the air was dank, puddles on the floor, and mold growing in the kitchen area. A huge mirror on the wall looked impressive from a distance but on closer inspection was decorated with gaudy plastic flowers, not the glass adornments that I'd hoped to find. But the engraving was pretty and I took a selfie, which everyone else who followed us in here this weekend would also do.

I went back to the wagon wheel room, my favorite part of the whole establishment. We had come at the right time, the lighting was perfect to capture the cobwebs and faces of the Asian faces hanging on the walls or trapped behind panes of glass coated with cobwebs, the bright sun valiantly piercing the gloom and throwing shadows against the walls.

We came across a few costumes and props but the main building housing these was falling down, its roof giving up the battle against the gallons of rain water and snow that had been pushing down on the once flat roof and flimsy walls. A few wooden struts were still gallantly managing to keep the shed structure mostly upright, but it was unnerving walking beneath it to explore, all the time expecting this to be the moment when one of those beams would just emit a loud 'I'm done!' and allow the whole building to collapse. I wasn't sure that what remained under here was worth the risk so I only took a couple of photos as I scuttled through.
By the time we were finished photographing, the sun was high and so were our appetites. We left the rooms to resume their silence and headed off to a brunch of back and beer.